1 Peter Chapter 3:1-7, Part 1

“Your adornment must not be merely external – braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.” ~ I Peter 3:3-4 (NASB)

A Prayer Over Our Children

I pray my daughter will submit to her husband and be an example of Christ through her words, behavior, thoughts, and actions. May You manifest all purity and reverence in her life, oh God, making her inner self the source of her beauty. Help her gentle and quiet spirit be her adornment rather than fashionable hair, clothes, or jewelry. Oh Lord, I pray that You will bless my daughter with a beautiful relationship of trust, submission, and respect to her husband. Likewise, may her husband treat her with all love, consideration, mutual respect, and as a precious heir to Your gift of life. Oh God, be her joy and her strength that she may never give into fear and do what is right all the days of her life. ...

For two days, Mommy-failure has clung like soot, blackened smoke to my skin. The voice of condemnation and fear crowded my peace and threatened my trust. There I stood with a mountain of laundry before me on the bed, stretching long like the ocean and endless in its task. At 9:30 in the evening, all I wanted to be was done with my Mommy responsibilities and free to let my fingers type away. But tonight, was different. Tonight, I knew that somehow, through the mount of clothes, I needed to fend off the invisible fists which beat me raw. 
     
Slamming against my mind like a sledgehammer, my knees buckled and threatened to fall. I felt helpless in the thick onslaught which pummeled me gasping for breath. All I could do was cry out to the Lord and text a friend, pleading for her prayers. I huddled on the carpeted floor of the bedroom, hugging my legs close to my chest with head bowed to ward off the attack. Then, as gentle as summer rain, relief washed over me, watering what was barren and bare. Although it alleviated the drought, my soul was still in need of a thorough drenching. But, as much as I wished to stay in my cocoon, it was fearfully apparent that if the clothes were not folded, no one would be going to bed tonight. 
     
Unfolding myself like a pretzel, I began to mechanically fold clothes while reaching to turn on a television show as background sound. Yet this time, a soft yearning, delicate as butterfly wings, pulled at my heart. Turn on the Christian Contemporary music station instead, it called, urging me forward. So, on came the music station. 
     
Encouraging words filled the silent bedroom. Jeremy Camp’s voice sung in proclamation over me, lending strength back beneath my feet. “The same power which raised Jesus from the dead . . . lives in us, lives in us….” Other songs ministered to my aching heart, putting pieces of what was shattered back together. Like a healing balm, their words soothed what was bleeding and bruised.
   
Yesterday, an incident occurred which made me doubt my parenting ability, hurtling me down a path of Mommy failure and disheartenment. Then, to compound it all into a double-fisted punch, my vision-impairment pummeled any shreds of dignity or ability I possessed as a parent. The insecurities of old sprung up with vicious intensity and pounded the recesses of my thoughts. 
     
You can’t be a good Mom because you can’t see. You can’t do the job. Thick and fierce the battle waged war within me as I struggled to tamp down the doubts, but the steady, stealthy steps of deceit refused to budge. So that night, amidst the clean avalanche of clothes, the fight came to a head. Yet on the bended knee of prayer warrior women, the power of Christ began to unfurl. 
     
I sat on the bedroom floor, crippled by fears and condemnations. My mind slogged like jello, unable to find words to combat the swirling accusations. But, even through my groans, the prayers of others and the wings of God covered and sheltered me.  
     
Yet, even as the saints took back the battle, my heart bled raw by the simple truths of my visual limitations. Torn to pieces and incomplete with the holes of blindness, I fell to my knees at the foot of the bed. 
     
Oh God, I groaned, tears forming in my eyes, take what is bleeding and raw and use it for Your glory. Transform the ripped edges and bleeding holes into something beautiful. Use my pain and grief for Your end and not my own. Please Lord, use my very weakness for Your great purposes.
     
And as I kneeled with spirit crying out to the One True God, Creator of All things, words suddenly filled the air, piercing my consciousness and speaking directly to my groans.
     
“You’re parting waters, making a way for me…” Hilary Scott’s song, Still, declared. “You’re moving mountains that I don’t even see…” she sang.

My heart stood still. It was as if God, Himself, were speaking directly to the prayer of my heart. Could it be? I wondered, is He parting waters and moving mountains for me? Is He speaking to me? Yet, even as I questioned, I knew these words were meant just for me at this exact hour to speak to my broken but humble offerings.
     
“You’ve answered my prayers, before I even speak…” continued the verse.

Fresh tears sprang to my eyes as God gently spoke to my brokenness, affirming His love for me. To know that even before I uttered a word, He knew my heart, touched deep my soul and resonated to my most parched places. To know that He has heard and already answered my gasping breathes filled me with humble gratitude and awed reverence. To know a love so deep and so wide, brought me to my knees with head bowed low before the throne of grace. 

"…all you need from me is to…be still.” The closing words of the chorus floated over me like a benediction as a holy presence descended thick upon the room, it flooded my heart to overflowing. All I could do was lay prostrate on the floor, soaking in the words and letting them permeate my being. Where I had been fractured and frail, peace like a waterfall flooded over me, cleansing me of pain and washing me with serenity. Healing light was left in its wake, allowing my breath to draw deep and full in its measure. And as I lay in a crumpled heap on the floor, breathing in and breathing out, all that I possessed the strength to do was hear, listen, and receive these tender assurances. All I could do was be still.
     
Dear fellow parents and friends, in our weakness and sufferings, God hears our cries and our groanings. When our days, weeks, and months crash down in utter chaos and disrepair, God already knows. And when we fall beaten and bleeding with wordless prayers on our tongues, He has already heard and answered us. 
     
Most importantly is the reminder that it is God from whom we derive strength and power. It is God who fights our battles and parts the water for us to stand. And it is God who makes all things possible. 
     
So many times, I seek to strive in my own strength, flailing to force the hand of opportunity and change rather than step back and let God work. I find my pride, selfishness, wrong motives, and sin, getting in the way. Yet, it is when I am still before the Lord, casting all self aside and leaning solely upon Him where I find rest. And it is in this stillness where strivings cease that God’s power and majesty shine the brightest. For when we quiet ourselves before God, He becomes our focus rather than our selves thereby allowing Him to increase as we decrease. And it is when we are still that we are able to sit back in peace to witness the great and mighty work of God. For God can and will part the waters and make a way for us. He will move mountains and remove any seen or unseen obstacle which stands in His way for He has already heard our cries. All that we need to be is still. 
     
So, in this hour and this moment, I encourage each one of you to cease from your strivings. Meet with God in the quiet and allow His gentle yet rich presence to fill you from within. Stop and draw near so that you may hear His still, soft voice. Come, sit at the foot of His throne and be still. 

Please click on the link below to listen to Hilary Scott’s song, Still: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAt33bI-1As

A Parent’s Prayer

Oh God, in the middle of the hustle and the bustle, help me be still before You. Draw me near so that I may hear You above all the noise. Oh God, use every part of me for Your glory, even my weak and bleeding places. Amidst the busy chaos, help me to bow before You with humble offerings of praise for You are worthy, our Lord and King. When I cannot,  let me take shelter beneath Your wings for You are mighty to save. Part the seas and make a way for me this day, oh God, while You move the mountains that I don’t even see.