1 Timothy Chapter 1

“I thank him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because he judges me faithful, appointing me to his service, . . .” I Timothy 1:12 (ESV)

Prayer for Our Children

Please protect my little one from false teachings and keep her faithful to You, never straying from Your Truth. Oh Lord, let love abide within her, a love that grows from a pure heart, a good conscience, and a sincere faith. Fill my little one with strength, consider her faithful, and appoint her to Your service. May You show her mercy, showering her abundantly with Your grace, faith, and love. May she worship You as King eternal, immortal invisible, and only God. Help her fight the good fight, holding onto faith and a good conscience, never walking away but always believing in You.  ...

​ Are you parents also fighting the good fight when it comes to autonomy versus obedience with your little one? These days, more often than not, it feels like Little girl believes she is a miniature adult, able to make her own decisions and choices independent of her Mommy or Daddy. Mornings like today, the battle wages thick with my hands thrown high in surrender. Yet, my hands are held high not in defeat but in holy surrender to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, one true God, who knows all things, is in control of all things, and working all things out for His good.

​“I don’t want to,” argued a sullen little girl with an obstinate expression. “No, no! No, no!”

I looked incredulously at Sweet girl, surprised at her resistance.

“I want to play,” she stated, pushing a pink toy car on the rug, “I don’t want to do that!”

Several seconds ticked by as I gathered my thoughts, analyzed the situation, and formed a response. I knew the proposed activity was one she loved and had even voiced interest in earlier, so it surprised me when the suggestion created such rebellion. However, as my little girl has recently struggled with finding the fine balance between budding independence and obedience, it came as no surprise that the issue at hand was not of preference but one rather of control. And with multiple skirmishes engaged in prior to mid-morning, it mattered not whether we performed the activity in question, but whether Little girl’s heart was where it should be – in submission to God given, parental authority.
     
“No-ooo!” her voice crescendoed. “I want to play first!”

I will confess parents, that my patience wore thin while my desire for obedience and respect mounted, bubbling hot like molten lava and ready to explode. Yet, despite my simmering status, it dawned upon me that the day’s balance for power hung in the balance right before my eyes. 

“Sweet pea,” my words came slow but firm, “do not argue with Mommy.” But Little one continued spluttering in protest. I closed my eyes and lifted a prayer for wisdom and help. Gentling my voice, I tried again. “What does Ephesians 6:1 say?” I asked.

Little girl temporarily stopped her rant and quieted, her play even coming to a still. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord,” she begrudgingly grumbled, averting her eyes from me.

“That’s right,” I continued, “you are to honor your Mommy and Daddy so that it will go well for you and so that your days will be long.” I sat down on the rug and looked at her, raising my eyebrows. “And that is why I love you enough to teach you to obey – so that it goes well for you.” I paused, straining to hear the whispering words of the Holy Spirit across my heart. “Do you know what it means for it to be well with you?” I asked, looking at a now quiet little girl.

​Sweet one looked blank. “No,” she answered, looking at me with curiosity. 

“Going well for you means…” I searched my mind for an illustration that a preschooler would understand. “If you can be trusted to obey, then good opportunities will be open to you.” I took a breath and plunged in. “If a mom of one of your friends wanted to invite another little girl to come over and play, who do you think she would invite? A little girl who was disobedient or a little girl who she knew would obey?”

Sweet pea answered quickly, “The little girl who would obey.”

I smiled at her and nodded my head vigorously, “That’s right! Or if one of your friends asked her Mommy to bring a friend to a fun amusement park, what friend do you think her Mommy would agree to invite – the well behaved little girl or the disobedient one?”

Sweet one grinned, a small gleam of understanding in her eyes, “the obedient little girl,” she answered with a bounce.

​“Yes!” I clapped my hands in excitement. “See? With obedience comes blessings and most importantly, God’s blessings, and I want you to experience all the blessings!” I sobered, “Blessings don’t come with disobedience – just conflict and consequences.” I leaned close to Little one, laying a hand on her small leg, “I love you so much that I want you to have the blessings that come with obedience. This is why I correct and discipline you, so that you may learn to obey and not miss out on God’s blessings - so that it will go well for you.” I reached over and drew my little girl into a hug.

Sweet one smiled up at me, her eyes and voice now gentle and happy, devoid of their prior angst. “Okay, Mommy,” she chirped and then grinned, “will you play with me?”
     
I would like to say that after this interlude, peace reigned supreme in our household for the rest of the day, but this is far from the truth. Yet, the victory this day was not a perfectly behaved little girl, but a mom who persevered to stay calm, firm yet gentle, and self-controlled when defiance poked and reared an ugly head. Likewise, triumph regaled not in whether Little one did or did not learn her lesson but in a mom who persisted in planting life giving seeds of correction and Truth so that it might go well with her child in the future. We, parents, need to remind ourselves of this truth, that it is not the outcome of each skirmish that defines our success, but rather the outcome of the entire war that is the measure of victory for our children. 
   
Triumph is clothed not in the glitz and the glam but in the daily toil and the everyday mire we encounter throughout each morning and night. It is held in every face we wipe, every boo-boo we bandage, and the playtime we share with our children. It is with every hug and kiss, every fold of the blanket as we tuck our children in at bedtime, and with the gentle yet firm rod of accountability that we consistently and persistently apply to our children. It is when we parents, extend love, grace, and mercy instead of deserved punishment and the law. Or it is when we stand firm and apply the Word of God lovingly in our children’s lives that we can then teach God’s life-giving truths of right from wrong. 
     
​Every meal that we cook, every dish that we wipe, every piece of laundry we wash, and each “I love you” does not go to waste. All these simple, mundane, everyday tasks and details help form the character, the soul, and the heart of the child that stands before us. We are training up not just small children but rather little adults who need our loving touches, our shaping influence, our wise words and accountability that are steeped and soaked in the molding, life changing, spirit forming power of the Holy Spirit. 

​Be encouraged parents, for it’s not just today’s battle, in and among itself, from which the war is won but the consistent, persistent, everyday perseverance to hold ourselves and our children accountable to the light of Christ, that wins the war for our children’s lives and souls. Keep persevering on, be strengthened and encouraged. You are making a difference in the lives of your children and in the lives of others. Only be open to the guiding and shaping influence of the Lord God and His Holy Spirit to tweak our rough edges and refine them to beautiful pieces of gold in the lives of the ones we love. 

A Parent's Prayer

Oh Lord, make me and mold me, give me strength in my weariness and joy for the journey. Help me to persevere with consistency and persistence to raise up my child in the way of the Lord. Holy Spirit, I ask that you be working in my life today, breathing the breath of life into my lungs so that I might be empowered and equipped to wage the war for my child’s soul. Guide me with Your wisdom and fill me with Your redeeming power this day.