​II Peter Chapter 1

“Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they render you neither useless nor unfruitful in the true knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.” II Peter 1: 5 – 8 (NASB)

A Prayer Over Our Children

Dear Lord, let my daughter possess faith, goodness, knowledge, self-control, and perseverance with increasing measure. Likewise, let her grow with godliness, brotherly kindness, and love. Clothe her in these qualities so that she will be made effective and productive in her knowledge of You. Cleanse her from her sin, oh God, and make her calling sure. May she never fall and may You richly welcome her into Your kingdom. Remind her of these truths, oh God, and firmly establish her in them. Oh Lord, let Your light shine through the darkness like the dawn. Be like the morning star to her, rising high to light her path and illuminate her heart. Carry her, Holy Spirit, and reside in her that You may commune with her and speak through her words to others. ...

Sweet Pea and I have been undergoing a trying season. Where peace and laughter permeated our relationship, arguing and angst now defined it. No matter what I seemed to say, Sweet Pea would immediately contradict me or answer in the opposite. To my hurt heart, it almost appeared like she was answering in the negative just to prove her own voice. Sometimes, I swear her oppositional answer was more reactional than a thought-out response. I also feared her argumentative attitude was becoming more and more habitual, creating a deep rut in our relationship.
     
I confess to you all that my reaction was not always perfect. If I am honest, I will admit that my responses were sometimes aggravating at best. Her whining and argumentative opposition just brought out the worst in me. I was horrified to find myself engaging in tit-for-tat repartee with my 5-year old like a couple of adolescents. Yet, I did not know how to stop. A bad cycle was brewing, and I could not get off the train. 
     
My mind and spirit knew that as the adult and parent, I should be the one in control of my emotions and responses. I knew I was the one to set the example. I knew I was to set the tone. But my tongue and reactions seemed to have a life of their own, auto-piloting me into flight before I realized that I had even left the ground.
     
It came to a head one Saturday afternoon when we were making grilled cheese sandwiches. I gave Sweet Pea specific instructions to use 2 slices of cheese per sandwich. Optimal gooey, melty goodness was the aim. However, Sweet Pea chose to disregard my instructions, doing what she thought was best instead. Rather than the double layers of cheese, she chose to sandwich only 1 slice of cheese between the bread. Perhaps to you this may appear to be of little consequence, but to me it spoke volumes. An attitude of “I know better” flaunted itself front row and center before me.
     
“Sweet Pea,” I said with well-modulated tones, “you did not follow my instructions.” I squatted before the little girl, bringing myself eye level to her.

Sweet Pea, who was busily drawing pictures on the table in the dining room, looked up curiously at me. “Momma,” she said, pausing in her artwork, “I’m sorry, I thought it only needed 1 slice.” Then she turned back to her drawing.
     
Due to the contentious backdrop of the past week, I confess to all of you that I overreacted … a smidge … well, okay, maybe a lot!  I felt my blood pressure rise and my cheeks flame hot. Of their own volition, my eyebrows narrow down into a frown.
     
“Well, Sweet Pea,” came my starched response, “I asked you to use two slices of cheese so that our sandwiches would be nice and cheesy. So, since you decided to disregard my instructions, your natural consequence will be a less cheesy grilled cheese sandwich.”

Sweet Pea looked up from her work disappointed.
     
Ladies and gentlemen, I should have stopped right there. I should have stood and walked away. But, feeling like the scorned mother after days on end of bickering, I plunged in for the kill.
     
“Yours will have only one slice of cheese,” I continued, “but Daddy and I will get two slices.” Standing up, I turned to march back to the kitchen, feeling highly justified in my verdict.
     
As you can imagine, my words provoked and stirred the pot. Pure indignation and hurt flashed over my daughter’s face. Pink flushed her cheeks and her eyes widened in protest.
     
“But, Momma!” She cried, “I want two slices of cheese too!” Her foot stamped hard on the floor. “I want two slices of cheese!” she demanded, her voice climbing higher by the second.
     
I will spare all of you the details and events which followed. What I will say is that I am thankful my husband was home to serve as the middleman and mediate. He helped firmly yet gently correct our daughter. He also courageously gave honest but loving feedback when I sought him for counsel. A brave feat, indeed! 
     
I’d love to say we were incident free the rest of the day, but the best was still yet to come. My husband had stepped out for an hour, leaving just us girls at home. Once more, the head of contention reared its ugly head, finding us right back to where we had left off with the grilled cheese sandwiches. However, this time rather than feeling irritation or indignation, my heart broke. How did we get here? I despaired, how can we even stop this cycle? Tears began to form in my eyes, pooling like a dam ready to burst. My lip started to quiver as my nostrils flared for control. Before I knew it, tears started to flow down my cheeks, and I began to sob. 
     
“I don’t want our relationship to be like this,” I blubbered to my daughter, voice shaking. My face scrunched up like a prune and my body shook with ragged breath. Sweet Pea halted in her discourse and just stared. “I love you so much, Sweet Pea,” I said, sniffling and looking at my little girl with sad, watery eyes, “I don’t want to argue with you.”

Sweet Pea burst into tears. “I don’t either, Momma!” she cried, flinging her little arms around my neck in a death grip hug. “I don’t want us to argue.” Her little body heaved with sobs, tears coursing down her cheeks. “I love you, Momma!” she wailed, burying her little head against my shoulder.

I hugged her tight as our sniffles and sobs permeated the air together. “Oh, Sweet Pea,” I said through shaking breath as tears continued falling, “we fight not against flesh and blood but against spiritual principalities.” My voice quavered and cracked with emotion as I sobbed out the last part: “We shouldn’t be fighting each other, Sweet Pea.” A fresh floodgate of tears streamed down my cheeks as I suddenly realized that the focus of my recent battle efforts had been aimed at the wrong opponent. Repentance and remorse filled my heart. “We shouldn’t be fighting each other,” I repeated through a wall of tears, “We should be fighting Satan instead.”

Sweet Pea started crying harder. “I know!” She lamented, throwing herself in my arms again, “I know, Momma!”

Cradling my little girl close, I kissed her hair and laid my head against her small one. “Oh, Sweet Pea,” came my muffled voice through her hair, “Satan has come to steal, kill, and destroy. I don’t want him to steal or destroy our relationship.” Once more, tears filled my eyes as the brevity of these words pressed upon my heart.
     
“Me neither, Mommy,” wailed Sweet Pea, tearing up again, “me neither.” She burrowed deep in my arms, using my shirt as her own personal tissue to wipe her eyes and nose. As her sobs began to quiet, I sat her up and met her weepy eyes with my own red-rimmed ones.
     
“Sweet Pea, I’m so sorry. Please forgive me for not doing a good job as your Mommy.” Tears slid down my face.
     
“I do, Mommy, I forgive you,” Sweet Pea started crying again. “Will you please forgive me, too?”     

In this world in which we live, we need to be reminded that we battle not against flesh and blood but against the spiritual principalities which assail us. So, it is also in our job as parents, that we need to keep this focus front and center. For me, I need to constantly ask whether my primary tool in parenting is my tongue or the Word of God. Am I relying upon my own wisdom or God’s? Am I using the world’s techniques or those grounded in biblical exhortations and truth? Above all, am I on my knees in prayer for my child, pleading for God’s help and intervention? Or, am I relying solely upon myself and the latest parenting trend?
     
Satan has come to steal, kill, and destroy. Nothing would make him happier than to destroy us and our relationships with our children. For this very reason, we need to take our parenting role seriously as warriors, fighting for the souls of our children. We need to daily arm ourselves with the Word of God. How else will we be able to renew, refresh, and strengthen our minds, hearts, spirits, and bodies when we feel worn down? How else will we know to combat false truths and nurture God’s ways in our children unless we are reading from the Book of Life itself. 
     
Our role as parents is not a passive one but one that is active and constantly on guard. Likewise, it must exponentially be so with our spiritual lives, particularly if we are seeking to maintain a pre-emptive strategy against our Enemy. Just as in war, we study the enemy so that we may learn how to fight them more effectively, so must we also be in the Word of God so that we may learn how best to combat and stand strong in the battle against Satan. We need to be armed with the Truth of God’s Word so that we may fight the good fight and don the armor of God.     
     
However, dear parents and friends, be encouraged for unlike the uncertain outcomes of battle waged here on this earth, our war against Satan is already won. The spiritual battles we fight are not in vain for through the blood of Jesus, Satan is defeated. So, it is in our parenting through bended knee that we need to petition our Heavenly Father and claim victory through the resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ. Yes, parenting can get discouraging and sometimes is downright hard, but know that if we enlist the aid of the very one who created us, God, Himself, we have a mighty, victorious, undefeated warrior fighting by our side. God has promised to go before us and fight our battles. We just need to believe, trust, and step out in faith, armed through the Word of God and prayer. And when we parents gear up for battle, let our war not be against our children but against our true opponent, Satan. 
     
​This day, may we look to the One who is, who was, and is to come as we wage war against the enemy in our parenting journey. Let us call upon the Name of Christ as we seek to do battle on bended knee in prayer, through the Word, and with the power of the Holy Spirit. Put on the full armor of Christ and join me in battle against the thief who has come to steal our very relationships with our children, destroy their souls, and kill our Hope for restoration and a future. Stand with me this day and let us unite together in Christ.

A Parent's Prayer

Dear Lord, move in my relationship with my child. Restore peace and joy where there is angst and pain. Intervene with Your might and power when I cannot. Give me wisdom and strengthen my resolve. Help guard my tongue and help me to be Christ. Amen